As you may know, I’m single.
That actually isn’t so bad when I write it out. Although, it took me a while to get to this point.
I was in a relationship for about six months (a short time, I know). I actually dated this guy when I was in high school and we broke up my first year in college. I believed God brought us back together to be together.
In reality, he brought us back together for me to finally close the door.
This guy was my first true love! When we broke up the first time, it was very difficult to get over him. Now, I am finding it is just as hard to do fours years later.
Everything was going great (I thought so anyway).
We were engaged and we were planning our lives together. I thought this would be the last relationship I would be in. To my surprise he wanted out. He no longer felt or came to the realization he was not ready for a relationship. As you can imagine, my heart shattered into million of pieces.
I questioned everything about myself. Did I do something wrong? Did I not do enough? You name it, I thought it. I even brought myself low enough to try to convenience him that we could be together and to not leave me.
I ignored the signs from God. I ignored the signs from within. I just did not want to feel like a failure and to have yet another failed relationship. I refused to accept that he no longer wanted to be with me. I CRIED FOR DAYS…HOURS EVEN.
In the midst of this, I decided to not speak to anyone and took my anger out on the people who care about me the most.
It was not until probably about a few weeks ago, I decided enough was enough! I no longer wanted to cry over someone who did not care enough to reach out to me. I no longer wanted to cry over someone who did not deserve me. I no longer wanted to cry over someone who fed me a false image of a life together that would never happen.
I discovered myself during this break up!
I discovered that I was indeed settling with this relationship, and it would’ve been a mistake if we would’ve gotten married. He is not and was never the guy God had intended for me to end up with.
I’m sharing this with you because, we too many times ignore the signs God is telling and showing us about someone. We see the potential someone can be and we refuse to accept the reality of what they are showing us daily. Just because someone has potential to become the husband you want, does not mean they will. Just because they have potential to be the man you want, does not mean they will become that.
It’s just that, potential.
I had to learn to accept that he was not and will not be the man I will spend my life with. Yes, we share some of the same visons and dreams. However, the way someone speaks to you and handle themselves says a lot about their character.
This breakup showed me that I don’t need a man to complete me. I am already complete within God. This breakup showed me to never settle for less than what I deserve. This breakup showed me to love myself more than any man and it’s okay to let go.
Breaking up with someone is a tough thing to go through. However, there is always light at the end of the tunnel.
Always remember time heals all wounds!
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