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Rejected

Rejection is something we will all face at some point in our lives. Depending on what you’re going after, you will face rejection more than others.

I always viewed rejection as a bad thing. I thought it meant that I was a failure. My last year in college I applied to numerous of jobs. I would say about 15 or so. Out of those 15 jobs, only one offered me a job.

I was excited and grateful when I was offered the position. I was even promoted within 30 days of working there to the written communication department.

I recently applied for a higher position at my job, and I was sure I was going to get it. It paid more and who cannot use extra the money, right. I prayed and I told God the job was mines if it was in his will for my life.

I had my interview and I knocked it out of the park!

In the midst of me waiting to hear their decision, God spoke to my heart. I am going back to school in the fall for my masters, I am going to be substitute teaching part time, I’m going to be publishing my second book, and fundraising for my father and I non-profit organization (I know I have a lot going on). Where would this new position fit into my future plans of what I wanted to do with my life? How would I have the time to do all of this, with the position having a strict schedule? Is this something I really want or is just for the money?

All of these questions came to mind and I started thinking about what I wanted to do with my life and the goals I had for the next year or two. I asked myself how would this position benefit me?

I decided to shake all of the thoughts I was having and just claim the job!

I went to work yesterday and I had the meeting with the supervisor over the department. I just knew they were going to offer me the position! She told me that she was impressed with the way that I interviewed, the way I was knowledgeable about what the role consisted of, and I just overall shocked her with how articulate I was. You can imagine I thought her next words would be that you have the position right?

She did just the opposite actually. She told me that they did no pick me and they went with another candidate.  She then went to ask me if I had anything to say ,and I replied “Nope. Thank you for the opportunity to interview with you and this just means that God has other plans for me”.

We often get upset when we don’t get something that we feel we deserve! When in reality God knows what is best for us and sometimes not getting that promotion is what’s best for us.

Being “rejected” is not a bad thing. You are not a failure if you did not get the job or the promotion!

We don’t know all that God has for our life and lets be honest if he revealed everything to us, that would take the excitement out of life!

I was not down and I don’t feel defeated because I did not get the position. I know God has far better plans for my life and I am just going to enjoy the journey. I know this position would’ve gotten in the way of where God is calling me to go. I just let my inner human get the best of me.

I want you all to know that it’s okay if you don’t get that job or promotion! If you wait on the lord and continue to be happy with what he has already blessed you with, when he does provide you with that promotion or job, it will be 1,000 times better than what you expected!

So if you got some bad news or did not get a call back, I want you to dust yourselves off. I want you to pray that Gods will be done in your life and move forward. It’s not easy to do, but it’s a must. Sometimes we are being tested to see how we will react to unpleasant news.

Remember God always has something greater in stored for you! When one opportunity doesn’t present itself, remember God’s plan or opportunity is far greater than you can imagine!

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Time Heals All Wounds

As you may know, I’m single.

That actually isn’t so bad when I write it out. Although, it took me a while to get to this point.

I was in a relationship for about six months (a short time, I know). I actually dated this guy when I was in high school and we broke up my first year in college. I believed God brought us back together to be together.

In reality, he brought us back together for me to finally close the door.

This guy was my first true love! When we broke up the first time, it was very difficult to get over him. Now, I am finding it is just as hard to do fours years later.

Everything was going great (I thought so anyway).

We were engaged and we were planning our lives together. I thought this would be the last relationship I would be in. To my surprise he wanted out. He no longer felt or came to the realization he was not ready for a relationship. As you can imagine, my heart shattered into million of pieces.

I questioned everything about myself. Did I do something wrong? Did I not do enough? You name it, I thought it. I even brought myself low enough to try to convenience him that we could be together and to not leave me.

I ignored the signs from God. I ignored the signs from within. I just did not want to feel like a failure and to have yet another failed relationship. I refused to accept that he no longer wanted to be with me. I CRIED FOR DAYS…HOURS EVEN.

In the midst of this, I decided to not speak to anyone and took my anger out on the people who care about me the most.

It was not until probably about a few weeks ago, I decided enough was enough! I no longer wanted to cry over someone who did not care enough to reach out to me. I no longer wanted to cry over someone who did not deserve me. I no longer wanted to cry over someone who fed me a false image of a life together that would never happen.

I discovered myself during this break up!

I discovered that I was indeed settling with this relationship, and it would’ve been a mistake if we would’ve gotten married. He is not and was never the guy God had intended for me to end up with.

I’m sharing this with you because, we too many times ignore the signs God is telling and showing us about someone. We see the potential someone can be and we refuse to accept the reality of what they are showing us daily. Just because someone has potential to become the husband you want, does not mean they will. Just because they have potential to be the man you want, does not mean they will become that.

It’s just that, potential.

I had to learn to accept that he was not and will not be the man I will spend my life with. Yes, we share some of the same visons and dreams. However, the way someone speaks to you and handle themselves says a lot about their character.

This breakup showed me that I don’t need a man to complete me. I am already complete within God. This breakup showed me to never settle for less than what I deserve. This breakup showed me to love myself more than any man and it’s okay to let go.

Breaking up with someone is a tough thing to go through. However, there is always light at the end of the tunnel.

Always remember time heals all wounds!

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Forgiveness

Forgiveness is key to unlocking all that God has for you and for moving forward in your life. Forgiveness is something that we all struggle with at times.

I believe we struggle to forgive people, because we have been hurt by them in more than one way, and we don’t know how to let go of the hurt we feel.

It is as if we prefer to hold on to the anger and hurt, than to let it go. In all honesty, you are only able to truly forgive someone through the strength of God.

I know for many years I held on to the hurt my family had caused me, especially my parents. My father hurt me because, he let me down in numerous of ways. I thought he would be the one person I could depend on, and would be here for me whenever I needed him. However, he wasn’t. My mother hurt me throughout my entire life, because she was not the mother I felt like she should’ve been.

I have dated guys and given my all to people that have come into my life and they eventually walked away, and washed their hands of me. For many of years and even at times today, I walk around with hurt and anger in my heart.

I have gotten to a point in my life where I refuse to let people hurt me. It’s okay to love people at a distance. It was only through the grace of God that I was able to forgive my parents and family members for letting me down. It was because of God that I am able to go around my family and not wish any harm on them or hold resentment in my heart about how they made me feel my entire life.

It’s because of God, that I am able to have a decent relationship with my mother and have a understanding about my father not being able to be superman.  God tells us to not put our trust into people, because they will always disappoint us. But to put our trust into him, because he will never leave nor forsaken us.

I don’t believe it was my parents intentions to hurt me or my family. I believe people are warped up with their lives and their feelings that they forget about other people. There is no handbook on how to be a “good parent”. Our parents do the best they know how, and they fall short at times.

I have decided to forgive all the boys I have dated in my life. Hating them or speaking negative about them hurts no one but me. I had many heartbreaks and I pray that I don’t have anymore. I pray that I date smarter and protect my heart more.

We hold forgiveness in our hearts because it is easier to stay mad, then to deal with the disappointment or hurt head on. We have to learn how to forgive the people that have hurt us. We have to learn how to protect our hearts and love people at a distance. We have to become accustom to protecting ourselves over protecting the feelings of others.

Honesty and forgiveness is key in this life. You have to be honest with the people that have hurt you, and you have to forgive them.

Forgiveness is never easy to do. It’s actually one of the toughest things to do, but it must be done to move forward. I pray that you allow God to heal your hearts and allow him to help you move forward.

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Make it Count!

Happy Wednesday folks!

I have inspirational quotes that comes directly to my email every morning. I thought I would share one with you today.

Every Decision. By Eric Thomas.

Every decision you make right now. You are determining,

where you are going to be in 5 years,

where you are going to be in 10 years,

where you are going to be in 20 years.

Those individuals that are successful today,

That are 30,

That are 40,

That are 50,

That are 60,

They didn’t start at 40,

They didn’t start at 50,

They didn’t start at 60.

They started right where you are today.

I found that to be inspiring because, we at times think that we should start later in life to make our dreams a reality or to build our business. We wait for everything to be in order before we start putting together our business plan.

Truth is, our finances will never be 100% in order. We may not be able to be 100% out of debt. Waiting for things to match up perfectly or waiting for the perfect time, will lead you to waiting your entire life. It starts with YOU and YOU pushing yourself today!

Start writing your business plan. Take time to meet with community business organization that helps you start a business (we have them in Michigan and they are free of charge).

Take it day by day and one step at a time.

The person you want to be 5, 10, 15, 20, 30 years from now, starts with YOU today.

You only get one life to live, so make it count!

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Being Brown in America

This was something I wrote a while ago, but I did not know what to do with it. I decided to share with you guys!

Let me know what you think 🙂

I was born in 1993 on March 23. As I look back over my life, I realized I was a victim to race shaming within my own country. I was born and raised in America, but I do not consider myself an American. In my eyes, an America is someone who is white, or who closely resembles a white person. All 23 years of living, I have been compared to other women and picked apart by society. Society (America) has told me that being brown skinned with course hair is not attractive. You have to be slim with a flat stomach, you have to be educated, but too educated because, you don’t want to scare of the male population with your standards. Don’t become pregnant at a young age, because you do not want to become another statics. Do not speak up about your problems or what hurts your feelings, because that is a sign of weakness.

            I was teased in high school for having a big nose. People use to call me a monkey. I never knew that black folks were called monkeys back in the day, and that it was actually a racial term that was used. I was called fat, overweight, and that I was not pretty. I started using violence as way to protect myself from the words my peers used. The worst part is that majority of the racial and hateful words I was hearing was coming from the people that looked like me. At 23, I had more people who look like me talk about me. I have come across some racists white people in my life, but majority of the racial language and hurtful things has come from the people who look like me. I cannot help but wonder why that is?

            I personally blame America! It was America who enslaved my people and pined us against one another. It was America who beat and enforced that being any other color other than white or the closest thing to it is unattractive. It was America who allowed people to run a country with full of hate. It was America who allowed people to kill, rape, and beat people they didn’t understand. It was America who failed black people, and who did not apologize for the hardship they put myself and my people through.

            However, I do not blame America for the racial slurs blacks use on one another. At some point in everyone’s life, they have to stop playing the victim. You have to allow the healing process take place and learn to forgive. We cannot as people blame every white person for what their ancestors did to ours. Not every white person is a racist, just not like every black person is a racist. Being brown in America has taught me that nothing in life is going to be handed to you. You have to work hard for the life and for the things you want. Being brown in America has taught me that the people who look like you would rather see you fail, than to see you succeed in life. I’m not sure if it is because of the Willy Lynch law that was installed years ago when slavery was around, is the reason why black people cannot get along. Or if it is fear that someone may make something of themselves.

            Being brown in America has taught me to build your own and stop wanting something that was never designed for you to have. I often wonder if my people and other races will ever come together and fully love one another? I can only dream of a world where color didn’t matter, but how hard someone worked or the character of an individual is what mattered. Being brown in America has taught me that the only way to be truly free is to build your own and to accept the way God created you.

Now, do not misunderstand what I am saying. I will never (out loud anyway) say that I hate my country. I do not hate America; I just do not like what America stands for. I never understood how a county could say that we are all equals, when in reality that is not the case. In all honesty, I would not trade anything I have been through or the words that have been said to me. All of the hateful words has made me a stronger woman, and now I walk with my head held high. I no longer hold my tongue in class or at work, because I’m afraid I’ll say something stupid. America has molded me into being happy with the color of my skin and the person I am becoming. I know I have a lot of more growing to do, and I am ready for what the world has for me. 

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Something Delicious

I have been hearing a lot about stuffed baked chicken. I never knew you could stuff chicken, but my co worker advised me that you could. With me developing a healthier lifestyle, I decided to spice up my chicken!

Ingredients

  1. 1 Green pepper.
  2. 1 Red pepper.
  3. 1 Onion.
  4. Mushrooms.
  5. Shredded cheese.
  6. 3 Organic chicken breast (make sure they are juicy. They also don’t have to be organic either).

Now Put it Together

  1. Heat the over to 350.
  2. Slit the chicken at the top or in the middle (on the side to be exact).
  3. Cut half the red and green pepper.
  4. Use a cup of mushrooms (cut them up).
  5. Use a cup of onions.
  6. Use a handful of shredded cheese (too much cheese can be fattening).
  7. Cover the chicken in olive oil (not really cover it, but coat it with it).
  8. Season the chicken and the things that are going into it (seasoning salt, pepper, and lemon pepper).
  9. Whatever is left or not used when stuffing the chicken, put it on the top of the chicken.
  10. Cook for 35-40 minutes (add a little water to the pan to make the chicken a little juicer).

Now eat!

This is a healthy and delicious dish! Let me know what you think.

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Go hard or GO HOME!

Yes, I said it! Go Hard or GO HOME!
I have been working out for about a month and one week now! That is a huge step for me lol. I have develop a routine (sort of kind of). I listed a break down of my daily workout below. Let me know what you think!

Monday: 40 minutes of cardio (treadmill, bicycle, jog around house, elliptical, etc.). I do a incline of 2.5 while walking at 3.7 mph. when running, I do a incline of 2.0 while running at 4.2 mph. This helps me to burn more calories and to really work my calves.

Tuesday: AB day. I do planks, crunches, squats, and I have found some workout videos that helps with your abs as well.

Wednesday: AB and arms day. I do the same workouts, but I do more. I have also found a video that is great for arms.

Thursday: AB and leg day. I increase the amount I do and I sometimes add weights. I do a lot of squats and I use a bar when I am doing them to get more of a workout.

Friday: All body workout. I don’t do 40 minutes of cardio, instead I do about 15-20 minutes. I run as long as I can without stopping and I have a incline of 2.0.

Saturday & Sunday are my rest days.

This is a great workout to try! If you do this like 3-4 times a week, you will defiantly see results!

Here are some of my results thus far (some old and some new).

          

** I know you may be thinking that I should give my body a rest in between, but I have come to the conclusion that I am more motivated to workout during the week and not the weekend. If you need to rotate days between, please do that. It is about doing what is best for you.

I tell myself everyday, GO hard or GO HOME! I say this because, if you are not going to give working out your best, then you should not do it. I am a big believer in when you do things to the best of your abilities, you will get the results you want.

If you want those abs, you have to put in the work! If you want that nice toned booty, you have to put in the work! Obtaining a healthy lifestyle starts with you and a made up mind. So don’t expect to get results if you don’t put in the work.

I know the holiday is here and I know we are all going to eat real good! Just remember to not over due it lol. Make sure to work out at home or go to the gym when you are able to. Every rib or macaroni and cheese bite counts lol.

Happy holidays and safe travels everyone!

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